Five. You guard your tongue.
“Whoever guards his mouth and tongue keeps his soul from troubles” (Proverbs 21:23). A prayer I’ve prayed almost daily for decades is Psalm 141:3 “Set a guard upon my mouth, O Lord. Keep watch over the door of my lips.”
Fully one-half of the problems I have had throughout my long life were self-inflicted, and most of those involved the lack of Christian self-control, the inability to keep my mouth shut. They said of Job, “Your words have upheld him who was stumbling; and (by your words) you have strengthened the feeble knees” (Job 4:4). Somewhere I found a variation of that, which says: “Your words have stood men on their feet.” I like that so much, it has been my verse and my constant prayer. (We’ve all seen the power of words to knock people off their feet! The stories we could tell! But here and there among us you will find those golden individuals with the power to stand people back on their feet using nothing more than words. I want that to be me! And so do you, I wager.)
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Six. You are in command of your appetite.
The appetite is a spirit within us, and sometimes it feels demonic, demanding, out of control! We smile at Proverbs 23:1-2. “When you sit down to eat with a ruler, consider carefully what is before you, and put a knife to your throat if you are a man given to appetite.” To be sure, the control of the appetite at all times–for food, success, glory, sex, anything!–is a huge accomplishment.
Seven. You can do good deeds without mentioning it to anyone.
“Whoever falsely boasts of giving is like clouds and wind without rain” (Proverbs 25:14). But that’s “falsely boasting.” What about if I really gave that much money? Made that great sacrifice? Did that sacrificial act? Can’t I tell that? Answer: Only in extreme situations. Only when doing so helps others and honors God.
Our Lord said, “Let not your left hand know what your right is doing” (Matthew 6:3). Do your good deeds in secret, Jesus said (Matthew 6:2-18).
Eight. You can resist the urge to meddle in another’s business.
“Whoever passes by and meddles in a quarrel not his own is like one who takes a dog by the ears” (Proverbs 26:17). John MacArthur notes: “The dog was not domesticated in Palestine and thus to grab any dog was dangerous. The aggressor deserved to be bitten for his unprovoked act.” (Ask any law enforcement officer about having to walk into a domestic fight. Many an innocent person has paid the ultimate price.)
Nine. You are able to respond to a harsh putdown with gentleness.
“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1). Sometimes, when an anonymous critics leaves a devastating criticism of something I’ve written on my website, the temptation to respond ‘in kind” is powerful. But how much stronger–and more difficult–it is to say simply, “Thank you. You may be right.” And perhaps, “Pray for me.”
Ten. You can make yourself do the hard tasks, rather than give in to the urge to take the easy path.
“He who has a slack hand becomes poor, but the hand of the diligent makes rich” (Proverbs 10:4). “The hand of the diligent will rule, but the lazy man will be put to forced labor” (Proverbs 12:24).
One who rules his spirit can make himself get out of bed and go to work, get in the car and seek out a difficult person in order to make peace, and write a check to a great ministry when he wants so much to indulge himself with that money.
Christian self-control means the one who rules his own spirit can be gentle with others and strong with himself.
A prayer I once heard and have used ever since says: “Lord, give me a heart of fire toward Thee, a heart of flesh toward my neighbor, and a heart of iron toward myself.” Amen to that.
